Scorpio moon.
leave me alone
with your divine feminine podcast
tell me you walked on your knees, sandpaper floor
womb turned into your throat
howled from the fetus of the goddess
tell me how you could have stayed
left before you were ready
how the whale spit you out
every time he called
how everyone ate their tongue
when your hands were searching for her
bleeding feet running through lifetimes
hidden babies in clothes too big, too clean, too new
too fake
groveled in the hip crease of the bed
the butterfly died on your pillow
and you did it all for
love?
walked into the wormhole constellation
breath of fire turned dragon
dragon turned swirling mist of neon dust
then black glass splattered all over the floor
broke the chain link borders
the cage that was supposed to be a haven
(i don’t trust the word safe any more)
shaved your skull, emptied it and ran away
to be free
i need to know
you also woke up screaming silently
amidst the covered stars
memories darker than the scorpio moon
trembling and hurling
no one to call
your guardian angels flew away
in fear
wanting to spit out your uterus
try calling your mother
one more time
trust
she will answer
one day
i need to know
that it is okay
to feel like
you’re being torn apart
your chest a tornado ripped open
your stomach full of stones
orgasmed from inside the ivory tower
burning lava in your throat
you are an explosion
no walls to contain it
the floor is shaking and you are
barely holding on
leave me alone with your breathing techniques
when your whole flesh coat is hardening
when your inner child is
sobbing and kicking
not taking in any air
not wanting to take it
and you are scared of your own mind
feel like you’re losing it
losing yourself
leave me alone with your
empowering thoughts
when you can not escape the loop
lying on the cold tiles
staring at the black sun between your eyes
through a curtain of hot water
hoping for the phoenix to rise
from the ashes of your home
please please please
leave me alone
so i can become
all-one